The Alchemy of a Happy Mind

I’m going to be a straight shooter and skip the diplomacy

You Don’t Need Anybody To State The Obvious For You !

You’ve been diligently following your self help hero/heroine and have worked hard to implement some minor and major changes in your life to acquire that seemingly unattainable goal of happiness.

You meditated
Pat your neighbor
Hugged without a reason
Attended that crowded motivational session
Traveled to break a barrier
Unplugged from the world to experience silence
Thanked the world for all you have
Focused entirely on living THIS moment
You even opened your arms and took your longest breath in the middle of a “happiness session” attended by a hundred people !!

Wow, so much effort ! You’ve tried various combinations in order to determine the perfect alchemy of a happy mind.


Now comes the moment of truth — Are you TRULY Happy ?

Yes? Maybe? In progress? No?

Don’t get me wrong for I have nothing against any of these methods and each method can work wonders in your life, but ask yourself a simple question : How long did you adhere to those methods to make your life happy forever ?

If you are still reading, you weren’t able to stick to these methods for long and to keep your alibis at bay, let me sum it up for you — Life got to you faster than a 30 day challenge.

The one and only reason why all these “ full of life ” methods did not work is because YOU were not the Wind Beneath Your Wings.
What the heck am I talking about, you ask ?

We are Happiest when we feel Powerful.

Picture yourself running late for work with an important meeting scheduled 10 minutes from now. You know you will arrive only after 20 minutes even if you drive at your fastest speed and can perform the once in a blue moon power walk to the conference room. Your colleague sends you a text 10 minutes later asking your whereabouts and you nervously declare your indiscipline of time.
She responds back saying “ No worries, we are waiting for you to start the meeting. ”

You let out a sigh of relief, but more importantly feel the sense of importance when you realize there is a room full of people eagerly waiting for your arrival regardless of your bad timing. You realize how YOU were the one controlling this meeting, THIS moment. How do you enter ?


We are happiest when we make our own decisions as opposed to others telling us what is right or wrong for us. We seek advice at various stages in our lives, but eventually we do what pleases us the most. The tendency to blame others for misguiding you is simply an outburst for the inability to control. The love for being a decision maker, to have your voice heard is immense, even if you were the junior most intern at your organization.

What your mind is constantly seeking is control. We live each day with tremendous uncertainty — uncertainty of a secure future, financial investments, relationships and even that annoying uncertainty when ordering food at a new restaurant. The moment you realize you have complete control of any given aspect of life, you are Happy.

If you think a 30 day retreat with 100 others in an isolated part of the world can offer a control to last forever, then you are mistaken, because you are handing over your life’s reigns into another person’s hands in hopes of changing your life forever. You are simply following the rules and we all hate rules ! How long do you think it would last considering how much you love control ?

Nobody knows your state of existence to the minutest detail the way you do. You are the only person with complete awareness of all your highs and lows, and no self help book or seminar can offer the unique solution to your unique problem. If you wish to drive a Ferrari, don’t hire a chauffeur.

YOU are the CEO of your life. Stop outsourcing the management of YOUR Life !

Take control over your life, and do it NOW.


I will not state the obvious solutions for you or make a list of 20 things you must change today in order to be happy — you are smart and capable to understand your needs. Neither me nor the most famous person on this planet has the right to make the decision for YOUR life. Whether it is the simple idea of saving more money to get yourself out of debt or starting a new career or simply trying to wake up with a broad smile each day, take charge, be the decision maker and just do it !

The more you continue to rely on external elements to change your life, the longer you will be waiting for happiness to knock on your door. You have already Googled all the information you need to start, so stop the act of (re)searching and get started.

The alchemy of a happy mind is simple — it involves a deep self reflection of one’s most important needs that forces a mindset of struggle and hard work to achieve it and take control, no matter what it takes. Empower yourself through your actions to own your life and live it to the fullest. Self help resides in the self.

Your Happiness Demands Your Control
Just Do It !


Related Articles:

The Delusional Positive Thinker – How to Change Your Mindset

6 thoughts on “The Alchemy of a Happy Mind

  1. Pingback: You are a Musk Deer in Search of Your Own Scent – Seeking My Utopia

  2. Suzanne Kopecki

    This was very thought provoking for me. I had never really considered it was my ability to control the situation that brought happiness. When thinking back to happy moments it does seem to be true!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s